How Dumb Fuck Mothers make Dumb Fuck Mothers Boys

You grab both cats, lean over and say to one, "Sorry for standing on your tail - it was an accident, I was careless" - and to the second cat that starts the clawing and biting shit - "You stay the fuck out of this" - grab it around the neck - and a firm cat appropriate back hand - as in not a beating - but establishing justice.

I only have a few HARD rules for my cats, NO getting on the computer desk and keyboard.... and if you need to go piss and shit, ask to go outside when the litter box is not around... and you can have a few bits of my own furniture (building site pine) to sharpen your claws on - but everything else is off limits.... And it's pretty much free range.